Muscle Fag

Hey Pink Fairy,

Why are straight guys so weird?

I was getting dressed after a great workout, when this really jacked dude I’ve seen around the gym walked up to the locker next to mine. Since we were standing right next to each other it seemed appropriate to make some small talk. So I said that I’d seen him around and it looked like he was hitting the weights pretty hard and that I was really impressed with his physique.

It was intended it purely as a compliment, but he got all weirded out like I was hitting on him or something. He says something about “no thanks…I don’t swing that way.” or something and stalked off after slamming his locker.

It was so embarrassing. And frustrating! I mean, ok, I guess he could tell I was gay. But just because a gay dude compliments you it doesn’t mean they’re trying to get in your pants!

I wish he could learn to loosen up a bit. I mean, the guy has a body of a fitness model. Why not be happy when someone appreciates it?

Alpha Patron Request by @masqulinity
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Sharing is Caring

Hey Pink Fairy,

I got assigned to share a suite with a couple of other guys at college this year. It is a pretty standard set up — we each have a small room for sleeping and studying with a common living area and bathroom to share.

The problem is my roommates, Brad and Zack. I just don’t mesh with them. I mean, I get it on some level. We don’t have a lot in common. They’re both jocks — tall, muscular, handsome, popular. And straight.

I’m fit, but kind of short and not terribly athletic. And I’m more of an intellectual. Me being gay hasn’t been too much of an issue for them, except…they’ve kind of made it clear that they don’t want me around much.

They treat our living area like their own private space so there is little space left for me or my stuff. They totally control the TV and gaming. And they even stop talking as soon as I enter the room, and sit there awkwardly until I finish what I’m doing and leave. I pretty quickly gave up any idea of hanging out with them, using the space, or…you know…having any kind of a relationship with either of them.

I have to be honest, they both make pretty nice eye candy. But I can’t even really enjoy that because I don’t want them to think I’m perving on them and give them even more of a reason to make things awkward around our place.

Truthfully, I’m getting kind of annoyed at the situation and being crammed in my little room all the time. I don’t need to crush on them, or be best friends with them or anything. I just wish they’d want to have me around more.

I sure could use your help.

Josh

Alpha Patron Request by @Masqulinity
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Road-Trip Reversal

Hey Purple Fairy!

I met my husband in college when we were both pretty young and newly out. He was a hot little track star and I was an up and comer on the football team. But, we both loved the outdoors and after a few perfect weekends together it was evident to both of us that we belonged together. I loved his fresh, lean body and boyish charm.

I’ve always been a big guy: 6’3” and muscular from my years of lifting weights. Puberty hit me early and hard, making me well hung and nicely furry to boot. So when I met Tad it was fun exploring his tight, smooth body and cute little 5” dick.

Ten years later we are still in love, but I guess I had always expected that Tad would…I don’t know…mature a bit along the way. My buff college frame is still in great shape, but I’m a bit broader and my face has a few extra lines. But Tad is just as boyish and twinky as he was the day I met him.

I don’t want to change who Tad is, but part of me is slightly bored with being the only “manly” one in the relationship. Always lifting the heavy bags, always expected to do the manual chores…always being the top.

Alpha Patron Request by @masqulinity
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Body Build-up

Hey, Purple Fairy. I don’t know if you guys work with straight guys or not, but I heard some guys talking about you and I wanted to get in touch. I’m a bodybuilder. I love building muscle and getting bigger. And I’ll do anything I can to grow.

And just know: I don’t have any problem with gay guys! I mean, they love my muscles and I get off on being worshipped. I even work a couple of nights during the week at a gay bar dancing and sometimes bartending.

I don’t mind the customers asking to feel my muscles in return for a nice tip, or arranging to meet for a more private, more naked session where they can really feel my body up. They just can’t touch the junk, because I don’t swing that way and I’m big enough to break any of them in two if they try. But hey…the money I get from them pays for my supplements…and that fuels my growth.

So, as I said, I’ll do anything. Will you help me grow?

Alpha Patron Request by @masqulinity
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Gooner’s Grievance

Hey Pink Fairy, my roommate is a complete asshole and I need your help. We’re both seniors living in the athletic dorm on campus. John’s in football while I’m a gymnast. Most of this year the situation has been good but not great. I’m out and John has made it clear that he’s not all that cool living with a gay guy. Mostly his animosity was limited to muttered remarks, snide comments, and jokes whispered to his other football buddies.

Until last week.

Unbeknownst to me, John used his webcam to secretly record me enjoying some “alone time” in the room jerking off. Now look, I’m a healthy, fit, red-blooded young guy who enjoys sex with myself as much as I enjoy it with another guy. And I kinda get into it, moaning, playing with my nips, fingering myself, sometimes even feeling up my own muscles. Anyway, that day happened to be a major session where I went all out and finished with a loud, powerful orgasm.

When John saw what he had captured he wasted no time in showing it to his buddies who, in turn, encouraged him to post it to our campus social media. Five minutes after that I was a laughing stock. Everywhere I went people pointed and laughed. I went into the student union and felt a cold chill run down my spine when I heard my own lusty moaning coming out of some guy’s phone. I ran back to the dorm, only to find John and his buddies hanging out in our room laughing. I had nowhere to go…and I wanted to crawl in a hole and die.

Pink Fairy, we need to take this asshole down. Will you help me?

Alpha Patron Request by @masqulinity
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Fair Pay for A Good Day’s Work

Hey Pink Fairy…

There’s this guy, Trey, at my school. He’s very cute, but he’s straight. I thought he was one of the good guys at first because he caught me staring but he didn’t bully me or shout at me. In fact, he befriended me and we hung out for a while. I should have known it was too good to be true because he just used me to help him write his term paper.

Trey ghosted me after turning his paper in. It hurt. I thought we had something. Turns out he’s done this to a lot of guys at school. He baits gay guys with his good looks and his charm to get them to do stuff for him like giving him loans, doing his laundry, and helping him pass classes. It’s fucking unfair and I’m fucking pissed.

Can you punish him, Pink Fairy? I think he needs to get taken down a peg. Maybe you can force him to go through with paying the sex that he implies he’ll do in exchange for gay guys’ help even if he doesn’t intend to. I think it’s only fair that he do something for us poor guys since we did something for him.

Alpha Patron Request by @masqulinity
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Loosen Him Up

Hey Pink Fairy! My roommate and I have started to have some problems.

He’s actually a great roommate — he’s kind, considerate, clean, and always pays his share of the bills. He’s straight, but is pretty gay friendly.

He’s also one of the most attractive men I’ve ever laid eyes on in my life. He works as a personal trainer at a gym down the street so his body is in spectacular shape — muscular and bulging in all the right places. Even in gym clothes his ass is a work of art. As if that weren’t enough he is seriously good looking with chiseled features, perfect dark hair, and piercing blue eyes.

Unfortunately, every time he walks in the room I get totally flustered and completely distracted. I can’t do anything but stare and stammer. I can’t seem to keep my eyes off of his beautiful body.

I guess I stared too much because lately my roommate has started spending less time at home and covering up almost completely when I’m around. Before he would be relatively nonchalant about walking around without a shirt, or strolling from the bathroom in a towel. Now, he rushes to throw on a robe or a hoodie and track pants whenever I get home.

I’m bummed that I’ve caused him to feel uncomfortable. I know I kinda perved on him a bit, but it was almost impossible for me not to. Can you do something to help my roommate really enjoy living with me?

Alpha Patron Request by @masqulinity
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Short and Sweet

Hey Pink Fairy! I guess I should start by explaining that I have a huge muscle fetish. there is nothing that gets me going more than seeing a hot muscle boy or bodybuilder. Frankly, the thicker the muscles on the guy, the better for me.

I’ve done a fair amount of muscle worship before I met my boyfriend, but now that we are monogamous I haven’t been able to pursue my fetish other than looking at images of muscular men online.

My boyfriend gets it, but doesn’t share my fetish to the same degree. That said, he’s put a fair amount of effort into building himself up for my benefit over the past couple of years. It’s just the kind of thing about him that makes me love him so much. Well, that and the fact that he’s able to take my thick 8″ cock like a champ.

Here’s the problem: my boyfriend is a really tall guy. And at 6’5″, he’s been able to get really fit, and he’s built enough muscle to look ripped when naked and even clothed (you should see him in his Lycra workout gear!). But it isn’t the kind of bulging, muscle-bound physique that I fantasize about.

It’s not his fault. It is really hard for guys his size to bulk up without resorting to extreme measures. He’s putting in the work, but is starting to get a little demotivated. Is there anything you can do to help my boyfriend become the kind of muscleman that I drool over?

Alpha Patron Request by @masqulinity
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His New Endowment

Pink Fairy, I love my boyfriend. At 6’4″ and 235 lbs of sculpted muscle, he is my idea of a dream man. And we have a wonderful relationship! It’s just… Well, he is very hung up about the size of his cock.

Given his height, build, and especially his big, thick, muscular thighs, his 5-inch cock isn’t exactly proportional and he thinks he is woefully under-hung. Personally, I think his cock is perfect. It fits beautifully in all the places I like to put it. I actually think it is really hot that this big hunk has kind of a tiny cock…

I hate that he feels badly about this part of himself, though. Is there anything you can do to help him be more excited about the endowment he has?

Alpha Patron Request by @masqulinity
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