Speedo Serpent

I heard a rumor about a guy… The story changes every time, but it goes like this.

The guy takes something. It’s either a pill, a drink, or some sort of potion. He doesn’t notice anything wrong at first, until his clothes just… disappear. Then, a speedo appears on him. He can’t take it off. Well, he can, but whenever he tries another new speedo just shows up around his crotch.

People kind of notice the fact that there’s this guy just walking around wearing a speedo, but no one really questions it or says anything about it.

I heard that you know a lot of shit about this stuff… Do you… Do you know what happens when someone puts on one of the speedos that the guy has taken off?

Beta Patron Request by @kentboiiii
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Conqueror Conquered

High King Cabeiron Erethian has done it. He has consolidated the broken kingdoms of New Corallia into a single empire, and the time for celebration has come. Little does he know that a powerful warlock has slipped his way into his court to exact a little reparation for the steep price of blood that was paid for his unity.

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Gooner’s Grievance

Hey Pink Fairy, my roommate is a complete asshole and I need your help. We’re both seniors living in the athletic dorm on campus. John’s in football while I’m a gymnast. Most of this year the situation has been good but not great. I’m out and John has made it clear that he’s not all that cool living with a gay guy. Mostly his animosity was limited to muttered remarks, snide comments, and jokes whispered to his other football buddies.

Until last week.

Unbeknownst to me, John used his webcam to secretly record me enjoying some “alone time” in the room jerking off. Now look, I’m a healthy, fit, red-blooded young guy who enjoys sex with myself as much as I enjoy it with another guy. And I kinda get into it, moaning, playing with my nips, fingering myself, sometimes even feeling up my own muscles. Anyway, that day happened to be a major session where I went all out and finished with a loud, powerful orgasm.

When John saw what he had captured he wasted no time in showing it to his buddies who, in turn, encouraged him to post it to our campus social media. Five minutes after that I was a laughing stock. Everywhere I went people pointed and laughed. I went into the student union and felt a cold chill run down my spine when I heard my own lusty moaning coming out of some guy’s phone. I ran back to the dorm, only to find John and his buddies hanging out in our room laughing. I had nowhere to go…and I wanted to crawl in a hole and die.

Pink Fairy, we need to take this asshole down. Will you help me?

Alpha Patron Request by @masqulinity
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Swapped Into Servitude

Uh, what was the name? Oh, Pink Fairy, I’m not sure if you’re there, but if you are, my school really needs your help. I’m a senior in high school and have been a punching bag for too long. A lot of us have. The jocks at my school constantly bully any and everyone they don’t see as one of them or as someone to sleep with.

I want to request that you take the bullies, and give the bullying victims their bodies. Make me and my friends into their image, but with our personalities so we can keep the school bully free. I especially want Kyle Smith’s body. He is the varsity quarterback and the biggest bully of them all. And also the only one hot enough for me to still find attractive despite how much of an asshole he is.

Beta Patron Request by @karkat-kanaya-mix
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Ménage À Deux

Hey Pink Fairy,

My boyfriend, Noah, is desperate to have a threesome. Despite me agreeing, he so loyal and dedicated he can’t bring himself to do it. He feels like he’d be cheating on me. I’m an only child and always wondered what it would be like to have a brother.

So, I was wondering if you could make me my own identical twin? That way Noah can have all the guilt free threesomes he wants, and I get to have a sibling that shares my interests.

Beta Patron Request by @trekoid-pr0n
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Fair Pay for A Good Day’s Work

Hey Pink Fairy…

There’s this guy, Trey, at my school. He’s very cute, but he’s straight. I thought he was one of the good guys at first because he caught me staring but he didn’t bully me or shout at me. In fact, he befriended me and we hung out for a while. I should have known it was too good to be true because he just used me to help him write his term paper.

Trey ghosted me after turning his paper in. It hurt. I thought we had something. Turns out he’s done this to a lot of guys at school. He baits gay guys with his good looks and his charm to get them to do stuff for him like giving him loans, doing his laundry, and helping him pass classes. It’s fucking unfair and I’m fucking pissed.

Can you punish him, Pink Fairy? I think he needs to get taken down a peg. Maybe you can force him to go through with paying the sex that he implies he’ll do in exchange for gay guys’ help even if he doesn’t intend to. I think it’s only fair that he do something for us poor guys since we did something for him.

Alpha Patron Request by @masqulinity
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Bitching Stick

Hello, Purple Fairy. I have a request, please. I ask you to make me a confident Latino twink with an impressive dick. The kind of dick that people will be willing to take if they see it.

I want even the most Alpha of people to take one look and be willing to submit to me. I would especially enjoy it if this turned me into a huge club goer, especially if I make it a habit of acting like I’d be willing to take a dick.

Maybe it could even happen the first time I go to a club? Like, the more I dance, the more I change. Please and thank you Purple Fairy.

Beta Patron Request by @karkat-kanaya-mix
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